Monday, May 28, 2012

Domesticated

Up until September 8, 2011 I was a single gal. Life had its ups and downs, dating was a pain in the ass and I was always out on the town with my girls. Hoping, wishing, and thinking... Maybe, just maybe, this will be the night. Life was a series of hits and misses. And then He showed up. A man that had been my friend for years, a man who used to drive me bananas and the man that ended up stealing my heart and being more than I could have ever imagined. He IS my wildest dream. This weekend started with me cooking a beautiful dinner while he built my nightstand. (he's pretty much built my whole house) We watched baseball, we went to our normal Friday night spot. Saturday was much the same, we went and saw my Mom, we went to the mall, and we came home and relaxed. We met some friends for dinner, we went to our normal Saturday night spot. Today we met with friends from out of town, we watched some baseball, we watched Game Of Thrones and came home. We had dinner and played cards... It dawned on me that I have turned into my mother and/or my grandmother, which is all kinds of awesome. I've been domesticated... And I love it. I cook dinners and breakfast and do laundry and straighten up and I have turned into Molly Homemaker and I love it. Being part of a whole, and fully belonging to another is more than I could have ever imagined it would be. I recently moved into my own apartment and started this journey of building a life with the man I love. We do well together. We laugh, we goof off, he holds me when I'm upset, he reassures me that everything is going to be okay, and I believe him. He makes me laugh like no other and he never makes me cry. He IS the love of my life. I've turned into someone that I used to roll my eyes at. I had resigned myself to being single, and thought about investing in cats. Then came this person who changed my perspective on all of that. He makes me want things that I never thought I wanted. I feel like I'm dating my best friend. They say when you know, you know, and I never believed that until I knew. I love you, Phillip Mueller. Yesterday, today, tomorrow and always. Love, Me

Sunday, May 13, 2012

"Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children" -William Makepeace Thackeray
Mama... Mommy... Mom... Or as my Mom always signs her cards, Moma :) It's cute, just like my mother. My Mom is a champion, a sweetheart, a "gorgina' and my inspiration. We have been through so much together and I am grateful for every second that we get to spend together. My Mom has always had my back, even when I was a brat and all through my angsty pain in the ass teenage years, she always stood by me, took up for me. My Mom has always believed in me no matter what. She holds my hand and she holds my heart in a way that no other person ever could. We have been through a lot over the years, but this last year has been a doozy. I'm not going to go in to all the things that have gone on since last August, but those of you that know us, know what's been going on. All I can say is this, never EVER take your mother for granted... EVER. She is my rock. She is the person that I can lean on. No matter what is going on in my life, there's nothing that a night on my Mom's couch, a bowl of her pasta and a marathon of Restaurant Impossible won't cure. I've been able to show up for my Mom in a way that I never thought possible and the trials and tribulations of the last year have only brought us closer together. We are like two volumes of the same book, and over the years, I realize just how much I wanna be like my Mom. She is kind, loving and gracious always. She is nice to everyone that crosses her path. She takes a genuine interest in everyone around her, and she does this all with unfailing grace. It's amazing to watch, really. I can't imagine going through what my Mom has gone through and handling it the way she does. There is no anger or negative emotion, only hope and the fight to never give up, no matter what. She is my inspiration. She is who I think of when I lay my head down at night and the first person that I think of when I wake up in the morning. Every house that we have ever lived in has been like a little doll house and to this day, my Mom's house is like a sanctuary. She has lots of plants and doves that nest in the plants and a throng of hummingbirds that raid her patio every day. She finds joy in the simple things in life. I get overwhelmed with sheer love of my Mom sometimes and I have to take a deep breath and just thank God for her. She's my Mother by God's choice, and she's my friend by my choice. There's nothing that I can't tell her, there's nothing that will ever make her love me less, although at times, I'm sure she didn't like me very much. It's weird, the things that I'm grateful for today... She is the truest friend I have. Thank you Mom, for always loving me, for never turning your back on me and for never giving up on me. Even when I was at my worst, you still believed in me. God chose the perfect parents for me. Of that, I have no doubt. Happy Mothers Day to the most amazing woman that I know. I am humbled by the woman you are. I can only hope to be half the mother that you have been to me. All the love in my heart and my world, Joanna Gail