Driving in the Valley - A Road Rage Rant

Driving in Las Vegas is like a combination of Death Race and the Demolition Derby. It's just re-damn-diculous. Every day.... I feel like I am my worst self when I'm driving to work in the morning. It's not because I'm upset about going to work, I love my work. I just get tired of these wingnuts behind the wheel!!!

Every morning on the 15 south, there's at least 3 or 4 cars that break the double line to get into the express lane. If people do this in CA, it's a $350 fine. But out here in the wild wild west, it's a bloody free for all.

Last week, when attempting to change freeways, a car was STOPPED in the lane with its blinker on to change lanes... STOPPED!!!ON THE FREEWAY!!!! Then there's the loves who won't let you in, or ride your bumper because 85 just isn't fast enough. That's always fun. Or when someone stays even with the car in front of you so you absolutely can not pass. Super pleasant.

I can't tell you how many times I've had a perfectly wonderful day and as soon as I have to deal with humanity on the road, I'm mothertrucking everything... calling these folks everything but a child of God, and sometimes rolling down my window to flip them the bird so they can know just how mad I am, and they deserve to be punished for breaking an unknown Joanna law.

I'm also guilty of driving like an a**hole. Shocking, I know. When I was younger, my cousins called me "Crash" because I was always getting in fender benders and getting tickets and what not. So, driving has always been a bit of an adventure for me.

Vegas is such a melting pot of folks, and quite transient. So, it's just a hodgepodge of the worst driving ever...

I will end this rant with a quote from my friend who suffers from a case of the road rages as well: "I have to remember that everyone, including me, does stupid $#!t on the road ALL the time. When you really think about it, it's amazing that any of us survive a 10 minute trip down the highway"

Deep breaths.... and be nice :-)

Goin' To The Chapel...

He proposed . . . You said yes, and now the planning fun begins!!! I can speak on this because I have been married for exactly one month and twelve days . . . Which obviously qualifies me on an expert. ;-)

Phillip and I had a wonderful wedding. We had tons of family and our best friends all there to celebrate our union. Our wedding was huge. We invited close to 240 people, and our final count was 200. Not sure how many of those actually showed. We think it was about 180. Wowzers!!!

After he proposed I was a little lost as to what to do. My Mama told me that the most important things to lock were a date and a venue. We decided on our anniversary, and thanks to the recommendation of a great friend, we checked out a beautiful venue. Once I saw the grass, the trees, and the lights... I was sold.

There are approximately 11billion websites, blogs, pins, opinions, and feelings related to weddings. Themes, colors, favors, place settings, gifts... OH MY!!! It's all very overwhelming, and I felt like I had to do everything. Also, weddings are expensive. We were blessed, lucky, and beyond grateful to have financial support from our parents.

Date. Venue. Budget. These are three very important things when it comes to wedding planning. The rest is just frosting on what is going to be the best cupcake ever. I'm a super Type A personality. I'm ridiculously organized and prepared, and I get anxiety if things aren't just so. Learning how to let go, and trust that things would be okay were big lessons for me. There were some arguments (there will be) and a few meltdown moments. But ultimately, we were planning a huge party, and parties are funsies!!

Phil & I are huge sports fans. So, deciding our colors and theme was easy. Blue (of the Dodger variety) and silver (let's go Dallas). I knew exactly what kind of dress I wanted, and it took me all of 19 minutes to find the dresses I wanted for my bridesmaids.

I used a few resources for wedding stuff; the knot, a great book by Colin Cowie and I used some ideas from Pinterest. I also went to my sis in law for ideas as well. We had a lot of help and we had a lot of fun. I knew what kind of shower I wanted and my friend graciously offered to host it. Phillip's awesome sister hosted our engagement party and our rehearsal dinner. The 10 months that we spent planning our wedding were filled with love, laughter, an awesome vacation, and wonderful memories that I will cherish for the rest of my life.

We picked our playlist, we picked our food, the invites had been sent and responded to, and there wasn't much more to do other than kick back and wait for our day.

A word on invites. We sent them 3 months before our wedding date. We didn't send save the dates because we felt 3 months was adequate notice, and save the dates were an added expense. There were a lot of folks who didn't respond and after about a week after the rsvp date; we got a hold of them. There were last-minute dropouts and a some no shows. The best thing to do there is just roll with it. I was so happy about who was there that I didn't have much time to focus on who wasn't.

My girls stayed the night with me the night before and Philly went to a hotel. :-( it was the first night that we had spent apart in months and I missed him terribly. However, the anticipation of not seeing him all day was wonderful. My girls and I stayed up way too late talking, and I finally fell asleep at around 3. We went to breakfast in the morning and around noon my house was full of females!! 2 makeup artists, 2 hairdressers, 3 bridesmaids, 1 photographer, and me. It was an explosion of hair, and make up everywhere.

We decided to do our pictures before the wedding to give us more time to enjoy our reception. I'm so glad that we did this. I'll never forget the butterflies in my tummy when my husband saw me for the first time. We had a lot of fun doing pictures and once guests started to arrive, I scurried off to the bridal room.

The ceremony was wonderful, the music was perfect, and I vowed to love this man no matter what for the rest of our days.

The reception was super fun and my only regret is not getting to spend more time with everyone there. We also didn't eat much, but we had a great time. We danced to the music that bonded us and we basked in them love of our family and friends.

I write this as an experience that I had with wedding planning, but I write this as a thank you. Thank you to everyone whom came to our wedding, to our wedding party. You all were amazing in every way. Thank you to our parents and our families, without whom, we wouldn't have been able to have the wedding we did. Ultimately, I thank God for bringing us together, and I thank my sweet Phillip for this wonderful life. I love you, dearly.

Domesticated

Up until September 8, 2011 I was a single gal. Life had its ups and downs, dating was a pain in the ass and I was always out on the town with my girls. Hoping, wishing, and thinking... Maybe, just maybe, this will be the night. Life was a series of hits and misses. And then He showed up. A man that had been my friend for years, a man who used to drive me bananas and the man that ended up stealing my heart and being more than I could have ever imagined. He IS my wildest dream. This weekend started with me cooking a beautiful dinner while he built my nightstand. (he's pretty much built my whole house) We watched baseball, we went to our normal Friday night spot. Saturday was much the same, we went and saw my Mom, we went to the mall, and we came home and relaxed. We met some friends for dinner, we went to our normal Saturday night spot. Today we met with friends from out of town, we watched some baseball, we watched Game Of Thrones and came home. We had dinner and played cards... It dawned on me that I have turned into my mother and/or my grandmother, which is all kinds of awesome. I've been domesticated... And I love it. I cook dinners and breakfast and do laundry and straighten up and I have turned into Molly Homemaker and I love it. Being part of a whole, and fully belonging to another is more than I could have ever imagined it would be. I recently moved into my own apartment and started this journey of building a life with the man I love. We do well together. We laugh, we goof off, he holds me when I'm upset, he reassures me that everything is going to be okay, and I believe him. He makes me laugh like no other and he never makes me cry. He IS the love of my life. I've turned into someone that I used to roll my eyes at. I had resigned myself to being single, and thought about investing in cats. Then came this person who changed my perspective on all of that. He makes me want things that I never thought I wanted. I feel like I'm dating my best friend. They say when you know, you know, and I never believed that until I knew. I love you, Phillip Mueller. Yesterday, today, tomorrow and always. Love, Me

"Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children" -William Makepeace Thackeray

Mama... Mommy... Mom... Or as my Mom always signs her cards, Moma :) It's cute, just like my mother. My Mom is a champion, a sweetheart, a "gorgina' and my inspiration. We have been through so much together and I am grateful for every second that we get to spend together. My Mom has always had my back, even when I was a brat and all through my angsty pain in the ass teenage years, she always stood by me, took up for me. My Mom has always believed in me no matter what. She holds my hand and she holds my heart in a way that no other person ever could. We have been through a lot over the years, but this last year has been a doozy. I'm not going to go in to all the things that have gone on since last August, but those of you that know us, know what's been going on. All I can say is this, never EVER take your mother for granted... EVER. She is my rock. She is the person that I can lean on. No matter what is going on in my life, there's nothing that a night on my Mom's couch, a bowl of her pasta and a marathon of Restaurant Impossible won't cure. I've been able to show up for my Mom in a way that I never thought possible and the trials and tribulations of the last year have only brought us closer together. We are like two volumes of the same book, and over the years, I realize just how much I wanna be like my Mom. She is kind, loving and gracious always. She is nice to everyone that crosses her path. She takes a genuine interest in everyone around her, and she does this all with unfailing grace. It's amazing to watch, really. I can't imagine going through what my Mom has gone through and handling it the way she does. There is no anger or negative emotion, only hope and the fight to never give up, no matter what. She is my inspiration. She is who I think of when I lay my head down at night and the first person that I think of when I wake up in the morning. Every house that we have ever lived in has been like a little doll house and to this day, my Mom's house is like a sanctuary. She has lots of plants and doves that nest in the plants and a throng of hummingbirds that raid her patio every day. She finds joy in the simple things in life. I get overwhelmed with sheer love of my Mom sometimes and I have to take a deep breath and just thank God for her. She's my Mother by God's choice, and she's my friend by my choice. There's nothing that I can't tell her, there's nothing that will ever make her love me less, although at times, I'm sure she didn't like me very much. It's weird, the things that I'm grateful for today... She is the truest friend I have. Thank you Mom, for always loving me, for never turning your back on me and for never giving up on me. Even when I was at my worst, you still believed in me. God chose the perfect parents for me. Of that, I have no doubt. Happy Mothers Day to the most amazing woman that I know. I am humbled by the woman you are. I can only hope to be half the mother that you have been to me. All the love in my heart and my world, Joanna Gail

My Friend Ivan

I have this wonderful friend, or should I say WE have this friend. His name is Ivan. I met Ivan when I moved back to Vegas from San Diego back in 2006. My memories of him include, but are not limited to, late nights dancing with a ton of friends and getting totally twacked on red bull... Fight parties at his house and him laughing at me because I despise Anderson Silva... Trips to Zion and his great laugh... Him hanging my Mom's Christmas lights one year and her repaying him in cookies. Cookies are legal tender in this crowd :)
Here is what I know about Ivan: he's friends with EVERYONE... He's constantly helping new guys, I don't think I've ever seen him with an empty car. EVER. His whip is always full of people, and he doesn't discriminate, he's an equal opportunity friend. The guy is an inspiration.
I usually write these pieces on baseball, or famous people who have died, or my once crazy love life, but today I want to honor my friend, our friend. Who, in a few short days is moving to Uganda. I haven't been able to look at him lately without crying. When I think of the space that he is going to leave behind. I don't question his reasons, no one has to tell me about wanting to be closer to family, hell, I moved from the beach to the desert in the middle of July because I missed my folks so damn much. 6 years later, I've never regretted that decision and I know that Ivan won't either.
He's been a staple in our community for almost 8 years and I'm sad to see him go. Tomorrow we celebrate his home-going and we get to enjoy his company just a little while longer, of course, if I don't want to wait, I'm sure that I can pop over to Bachi Burger, cause chances are, he'll be there :) Maybe there's a way that we can overnight him some Bachi Burger to the U G A... Hmmm
Godspeed, our dear friend. Thank you for who you are and all that you have done. You will be missed.

Get A Broom!!

So.... It's Jackie Robinson Day. The day where ever player on every team wears #42 with no name on their jersey. It's a special day. It's even more special for the Dodgers, since they were the team that broke the color barrier. It was extra beautiful today because Vin Scully was back and my lefty was on the bump.
Unfortunately, Clayton Kershaw did not dominate the way he usually does. Matt Kemp in full BeastMode hit his 6th home run of the season and before I could say boo, the boys were ahead 4 to 1 in the 5th. Kersh walked three straight and all of a sudden we're tied at 4. Fast forward and the boys get a triple play. It happens so rarely in baseball, so it's truly special when it does.
So here we are in the bottom of the ninth and the bases are loaded. Hairston is in to pinch hit and he fouled out, then Dee Gordon steps to the plate. Skinny Swag had a rough day, he missed some key plays that could have saved Kershaw's bacon... But Flash came through. He hits a walk off single and the Boys in Blue win their 9th game of the season.
They are off to a 9 and 1 start, now I realize they've played teams who are just bad. But I'm still excited about the best start since 1981... When I was a mere 3 years old :)
It's been a good weekend. The Dodgers won Friday, Saturday and today. We went to a beautiful wedding yesterday, and the weather is finally settling down. There's a lot to be excited about!!! Yeah, it's the Padres & the Pirates, but back to back sweeps is something to smile about!!!
It's an extra special day for baseball and I'm a happy and hopeful Dodger fan!

Hard Not To Be Excited...

It's hard not to be excited about this ball club. I mean, I'm excited and hopeful at the start of EVERY season... But this one, it just feels different somehow. I suppose I say that every year. I know that Dee Gordon is faaaaassst... Like rocket fast and he's so much fun to watch. I timed him on Tuesday, he was on first base for less than a minute before he stole second. He was safe at 2 before Barajas even knew that he was gone... He scored within 4 minutes of reaching first base. That's how quickly he manufactured a run. unbelievable.
I know that my Lefty, Clayton Kershaw, was battling the flu on Opening Day. He came out and dealt anyway, he pitched 3 innings, the infield backed him up... he hit a double and pitched himself out of a bases-loaded jam in the third before Donnie Baseball yanked him. He threw 77 pitches during Tuesdays game and struck out 7. This kid is special and so much fun to watch.
Andre Ethier has seemed to find his bat... Kinda, and it looks like he's actually having fun playing baseball again. Matt Kemp is Matt Kemp, he's also explosive and fun to watch. I'm excited about Justin Sellers, I'm NEVER excited about Juan Uribe, I'm curious as to what A.J Ellis may have up his sleeve.
But most of all, I'm hopeful. The Dodgers have a new ownership group on its way in... A group led by Magic Johnson (Magic loves LA and LA loves Magic) and baseball genius Stan Kasten. No one spends 2 billion on a team without intention of making it a dynasty. This gives me some hope, and peace that this storied franchise will no longer be dragged through the mud.
This is the time of year where everything is exciting, everyone has hope, I hear Vin Scully and I know that somehow, everything is right with the world... at least for those 9 innings....